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THE MISERY OF AN ADDICT by Benjamin Usang


Day 25
#366daypoetryforadvocacyandsocialchangechallenge


As I fall deeper into a manic state
I am a prime candidate
In the blood gene
To receive the drug addict trait

Blood pressure climbs at a dramatic rate
I seem to gravitate to the bottle of codiene then I salivate
Start off with the codiene like "I think I'll just have a taste"
Couple of sips of that, then I gradually graduate

To a harder prescription drug called Tram 200
like "Ya that's great"
I go to just take one and I end up like having eight
I wake up 12 hours later hungry because I haven't ate

But first I need my water and my cycotec
I fall back down cause I have a spinning head
Smiling in a state of euphoria yet I am the living dead

I start to hallucinate
Speaking to my own addiction, my personal saint

"I also represent
anyone on the receiving end of those jokes you invent
I'm your karma closing in
with each take of a pill
Find some remorse to show for your sin

Nope, it's hopeless,
I'm the denial that you're hopelessly in
When you say all of this is over I come back right in
But your approaching your end
But you refuse to believe that it's over, here we go all over again

Rising your urge, sanity clogged, Yeah ‘cause I'm affecting your brain with "No sense syndrome"
But in your head I am the voice in the back and I holler
After your mind is demolished
I am your lack of a conscience

I'm the ringing in your ears
I'm the polyps on the back of your tonsils
Eating your vocal chords after you scream in seclusion
I'm your time that's almost up that you haven't acknowledged
Grab for some water but I'm that truth that's too jagged to swallow

I'm the bullies you hate, that you became
I represent everything, you take for granted
I'm the hindsight to say, "I told you so!"
Foreshadows of all the things that are to follow
I'm the future that's here to show you what happens tomorrow

To all the addicts that call it quit"
So one last time, I'm back
Its time to relax
I've heard all that you've told me
Before it fades into black and it's all over

Behold the final chapter in the saga
Trying to recapture
The sense and essence of my drug trouble
Tragic portrait of an addict tortured
Trapped in his own prescription

Tap into thoughts
Blacker and darker than anything imaginable
Here goes a loud thud in the dark
As addiction takes another man's life

Inyang Benjamin Usang is a student at
English and Literary Studies,
faculty of Arts and Humanities,
University of Calabar.

08167631346
bigbenbhalifa@gmail.com

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